Two prison guards are changing shifts in the morning.
“You know that a prisoner ran off in the night?”
The other guard sighs, “Ah finally, no more of that dang hammering!”
Took my first shot today! So excited, and my next one is in 2 weeks.
It was a hard choice with so many options.
I chose the tequila one.
A camel with two humps is a Bactrian camel.
A camel with one hump is a dromedary camel.
What do you call a camel with no humps?
Humphrey, of course!
Ed: How old is your brother?
Ted: He’s a year old.
Ed: Huh! I’ve got a dog a year old and he can walk twice as well as your brother.
Ted: Sure, your dog has twice as many legs.