Past Winners

What did the mother worm say to her son when he was late for dinner?

"Where IN Earth have you been?!?!"

A man is applying for a job in a circus. The interviewer asks: "So what can you do?"

"I can do a really good bird impression" replied the man

"Oh we already have people who do that here, we won't be needing you for that"

"Oh well," the man said sadly and flew away.

What flavors of ice cream do you have?" inquired the customer.

"Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate," answered the new waitress in a hoarse whisper.

Trying to be sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have laryngitis?"

"No...." replied the new waitress with some effort, "just...erm.... vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate."

If I had $1 every time someone over 40 told me my generation was the problem...

Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined!