Past Winners

What's a robot's favorite snack?

Computer chips!

"Mr. Jones," began the timid looking young man, "May I... um... can I... what I mean is, will you...."

"Why yes my boy, you have my blessing," smiled the girl's father.

The young man gasped. "What's that? I have your what?" he asked.

"My blessing to marry my daughter of course," replied Jones. "That's what you mean isn't it, you want to marry her don't you?"

"Why no," said the young man. "I just wanted to know if you could lend me $50.00?"

"Certainly not!" said Jones, sharply. "Why I hardly know you!"

Them: "Why do you always carry a knife?"

Me: "The last time I tried to open a bag of chips with a 9mm, things didn’t go so well."

My landlord texted me saying we need to meet up and talk about how high my heating bill is.

I replied back: “Sure, my door is always open.”