Past Winners

Ask not what staying home on the couch can do for you...

But what staying home on the couch can do for your country!

Jerry was sitting down for breakfast one morning when he was astonished to see in the paper an announcment of his own death.

He called his friend at once, "Jim, have you seen the announcement of my death in the paper?"

Jim replied, "Yes, and exactly where are you calling from?"

Has anyone else's gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have?

I planted myself on the sofa at the start of April and I’ve grown bigger ever since.

Wife: I’m mad.

Husband: Again or still?