Past Winners

The air traffic controller, working a busy pattern, told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty (usually done to provide spacing between aircraft).

The pilot of the 727 complained, "Do you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make a three-sixty in this airplane?"

Without missing a beat the controller replied, "Roger, give me four thousand dollars worth!"

I asked my North Korean friend how it was to live in North Korea.

He said he can’t complain.

Did you hear about the guy who made a fortune investing in apples?

Turns out he was in cider trading.

The wealthy socialite Mrs. Smythe was making final arrangements for an elaborate reception.

“Nora,” she said to her veteran servant, “for the first half-hour I want you to stand at the drawing-room door and call the guests’ names as they arrive.”

Nora’s face lit up. “Thank you, ma’am,” she replied. “I’ve been wanting to do that to some of your friends for the last 20 years.”