bar & drinking jokes

A drunk was discovered late at night crawling along the Boardwalk at Atlantic City. A policeman approached him and asked: "What do you think you are doing?"
He answered: "Officer, I am going to climb this ladder, if it takes me all night!"

Two drunken men were driving home. The first started screaming: - Jim, watch out for the wall, watch out for the waaaaall! Baaaaam! They hit the wall. The next day in the hospital the first man asked his friend: - You good for nothing, I've been screaming for you to watch out, why didn't you? Jim answered him: - IT WAS YOU DRIVING!!!

Two drunks were staggering home along a railway line. “This is the longest staircase I’ve ever climbed, moaned one.
“It certainly is,” slurred his body. “And the banister’s so low; my back’s killing me.”

A little man is sitting in a bar when a big guy comes up and says here’s a punch from Japan the little man gets up and the big guy goes here’s a kick from Korea knocking him down the little guy just smiles and goes away 15 minutes later he comes over and knock the guy out cold then he looks at the bartender and says when he wakes up tell him that was a crowbar from "Lowes."