family jokes
Favorite this joke Mother had decided to trim her household budget wherever possible, so instead of having a dress dry-cleaned she washed it by hand.
Proud of her savings, she boasted to my father, "Just think, Fred, we are five dollars richer because I washed this dress by hand."
"Good," my dad quickly replied. "Wash it again!"
Bob: What are you doing with a pencil and paper?
Ted: I’m writing a letter to my brother.
Bob: But you don’t know how to write.
Ted: That’s okay, my brother can’t read.
My wife said that my granddaughter has me wrapped around her little finger.
I said, "That's not true. I said 'no' to her just yesterday."
"What did she ask you?"
"She asked me if there was anything I wouldn't give her."
I decided to do research on my ancestry and went to a genealogy professional.
First question: "Have you any poor relations?"
"Not any that I know."
Second question: "Have you any rich relations?"
"Not any that know me."
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