My wife has weekly lessons with Satan on how to be more evil...
I can vouch that what ever she charges him is well worth it!
I am getting married for the 5th time...
Having been married 4 times before I can tell when it's right!
One night while I was watching TV, I got a call from a strange number. Before I could react, my wife reached over, grabbed my phone and answered it.
"Honey," a sweet woman's voice came from my phone, "why haven't you been coming over lately?"
My wife got so angry that she started making a scene. In order to calm her down, I had no other choice but to go shopping with her and bought the bag she had been wanting. When we got home, my wife went inside and left her phone outside in the car. I was just about to bring it in to her when the phone buzzed. A new message appeared on the screen...
"Did you get that bag?"
My wife and I recently took a trip down Route 66. We took side trips if it looked promising. On one of these side trips we passed this quaint country store. Then we kept passing stores similar to that one.
After the third time my wife says out loud, "How many roads does a man have to drive down before he admits he's lost?"