marriage jokes

A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"

"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I would have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!"

A friend of mine was having a bit of marital-tension in his household and was trying to figure out just what to do about it.

In the course of our conversation, I said to him, "You know, quite often God speaks to us through our wives."

My friend looked at me and said, "Oh yeah? Well I'm pretty sure God doesn't use that kind of language!"

I gave my father $100 and said, “Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.”

So he went out and bought a present for my mother.

Husband and wife were having a discussion about their in-laws. The wife declares that she "hates" her in-laws.

The husband replies, "I like your mother-in-law more than I like mine!"