misc jokes

What is the longest word in the world?

Smiles ... because there is a MILE between the first and last letter.

Sometimes when I'm driving, I know I want to change lanes. I'm just not sure which lane I want. So I turn on my hazard lights.

I may be going left, I may be going right ... either way, you have been warned.

I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache, and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.

What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his school examination?

"Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing!"