Best Jokes

A man walked into a bar with a banana on his head. As he served him, the bartender said, "Look, I don't know if you realize this, but you've got a banana on your head."

"That's okay," said the man. "I always wear a banana on my head on Tuesdays."

"But today's Wednesday," said the bartender.

"It's not, is it?" groaned the man. "Oh no! I must look like a complete idiot!"

I’ll do algebra, I’ll do statistics, I’ll even do trigonometry…

But graphing, THAT is where I draw the line!

I wasn't planning on going for a run this morning, but those mall security guards came out of nowhere!

Did you hear about the professional golfer who got arrested for assaulting his chauffeur?

All he did was take out his driver.