What is at the end of everything?
The letter 'G'.
Mother: "Son, finish your breakfast. It's not good to leave things undone or unfinished."
Son: "Then I will go back to sleep."
Mother: "Why?"
Son: "Because I want to finish my sleep."
A guy asks his neighbor in an apartment building, “Mr Trepper, you live directly above me and you have the same 2-room apartment as I do. How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy when you moved in?
“We got 18 rolls,” answers the neighbor.
Two months later the guy meets his neighbor again and says, “It’s really funny – I put the wallpaper on everywhere and I still had 10 rolls left over.”
Neighbor smiles, “Yeah, so did we.“
Two friends were chatting. "I've just bought a pig!" said the first.
"But where will you keep it?" asked the second. "Your yard's much too small for a pig!"
"I'm going to keep it under my bed," replied the first.
"But what about the smell?"
"He'll soon get used to that."