Latest Jokes

After resisting the advance of technology for many years I finally gave in and bought a cell phone. A few days later I called my wife and told her someone kept texting me but when I checked I didn't have a text message.

My wife asked who it said was sending a text. I told her I wasn't sure about the name but I thought it was a lady named Betty Low.

After a short pause my wife responded with, "I think you mean 'Battery Low'."

Mom: Why did you decide to study earthquakes?
Tom: I just cracked up!

Sammy: Why did you steal that broom?
Tammy: I flew off the handle!

Nan: Why did you knock over the Chinese Checkers?
Dan: I lost my marbles!

Jenny: Why did you chase that squirrel?
Lenny: I went nuts!

Jon: Why did you throw all those baseballs?
Ron: I pitched a fit!

Kay: Why did you burn the pancakes?
Jay: I flipped out!

Jerry: Why did you jump in the pool?
Terry: I went off the deep end!