Latest Jokes

$9.00 won 3 votes

Why did the duck cross the road?

To prove he was not chicken.

3 votes

posted by "Eufaulasrguy" |
0 votes

Mom: Why did you decide to study earthquakes?
Tom: I just cracked up!

Sammy: Why did you steal that broom?
Tammy: I flew off the handle!

Nan: Why did you knock over the Chinese Checkers?
Dan: I lost my marbles!

Jenny: Why did you chase that squirrel?
Lenny: I went nuts!

Jon: Why did you throw all those baseballs?
Ron: I pitched a fit!

Kay: Why did you burn the pancakes?
Jay: I flipped out!

Jerry: Why did you jump in the pool?
Terry: I went off the deep end!

0 votes

CATEGORY Puns
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$10.00 won 3 votes

A PhD student, a post-doc, and their professor are walking through a city park and they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke.

The Genie says, “I usually only grant three wishes, so I’ll give each of you just one.”

“Me first! Me first!” says the PhD student.

“I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat with a gorgeous woman.”

Poof! He’s gone.

“Me next! Me next!” says the post-doc. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with a professional hula dancer on one side and a Mai Tai on the other.”

Poof! He’s gone.

“You’re next,” the Genie says to the professor.

The professor says, “I want those guys back in the lab after lunch.”

3 votes

posted by "AllAboutHappiness" |
$6.00 won 1 votes

Little Emily was at her first wedding and gaped at the entire ceremony. When it was over, she asked her mother, "Why did the lady change her mind?"

Her mother asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, she went down the aisle with one man and came back with another one."

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |