Latest Jokes

1 votes

A young girl who was writing a paper for school came to her father and asked, "Dad, what is the difference between anger and exasperation?"

The father replied, "It is mostly a matter of degree. Let me show you what I mean." With that the father went to the telephone an dialed a number at random. To the man who answered the phone, he said, "Hello, is Melvin there?"

The man answered, "There is no one living here named Melvin. Why don't you learn to look up numbers before you dial them?"

"See," said the father to his daughter. "That man was not a bit happy with our call. He was probably very busy with something and we annoyed him. Now watch...." The father dialed the number again. "Hello, is Melvin there?" asked the father.

"Now look here!" came the heated reply. "You just called this number and I told you that there is no Melvin here! You've got a lot of nerve calling again!" The receiver slammed down hard.

The father turned to his daughter and said, "You see, that was anger. Now I'll show you what exasperation means." He dialed the same number, and when a violent voice roared, "Hello!," the father calmly said, "Hello, this is Melvin. Have there been any calls for me?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$8.00 won 2 votes

A politician asked a well known author, "Did you know that 'Sumac' and 'Sugar' are the only two words in English, that begin with the letters 'Su' but are pronounced like 'Shu'?"

The author replied, "Sure."

2 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
posted by "Janice Marler" |
$7.00 won 2 votes

Ben was complaining to his friend Ralph about his new girlfriend. "I think Tonya is a hoarder. I went over to her place for the first time yesterday and everywhere I looked, there were magazines. Dozens of them, strewn around everywhere. People, Good Housekeeping, Readers Digest, TV Guide, Life, Time, Newsweek. You name it, she had it."

"I wouldn't go out with her anymore if I were you," said Ralph.

"Why not?"

"She has issues."

2 votes

posted by "Alan Valentine" |
1 votes

A lawyer meets with the family of a recently deceased millionaire for the reading of the will.

"To my loving wife, Rose, who always stood by me, I leave the house and $2 million," the attorney reads.

"To my darling daughter, Jessica, who looked after me in sickness and kept the business going, I leave the yacht, the business and $1 million."

"And finally," the lawyer concludes, "to my cousin Dan, who hated me, argued with me and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong. Hi Dan!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |