Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the couch with his head in my lap. I carefully removed his glasses.
"You know, honey," I said sweetly, "Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married."
"Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!"
A little boy thanked his grandfather for the set of drums he bought him for his birthday. “They’re the best present I’ve ever had,” he said. “They’ve already earned me $80.”
“Wow!”’ said the grandfather. “You must have learned to play them real good!”
“Not really,” said the boy. “But Mom gives me $5 not to play them during the day, and Dad gives me $5 not to play them in the evening.”
What is the worlds biggest sphere?
The At-most-sphere!
The Dean is hospitalized after a heart attack.
As he is lying in his hospital bed reflecting on his near brush with death, an attendant arrives with a lovely bouquet of flowers.
The Dean asks the attendant to hand him the card and finds that it reads, "By a vote of 26 to 3 with 2 abstentions, the faculty wish you a speedy recovery."