I ordered a cell phone case from an online retailer, and they sent me a child size face mask.
So I put it on my phone and it hasn't caught a virus since!
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory...
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
"Hey Alexa, can you check my bank account and see what Apple product I can afford to buy...."
Alexa: "Apple Juice."
Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: "Close Enough."