computer jokes

Category: "Computer Jokes"
2 votes

A chemical engineer, electrical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer are on a road trip. The car breaks down.

The electrical engineer looks under the hood and can't find anything wrong.

The chemical engineer checks the oil and fuel and can't find anything wrong.

The Microsoft engineer says, "Close all the windows, and try again."

2 votes

CATEGORY Computer Jokes
posted by "Robert Hill" |
$5.00 won 11 votes

A client called my help desk saying she couldn’t send an e-mail. When I was done troubleshooting the problem, she interrupted me to ask, “Wait a minute, do I type @ in lower or uppercase?”

11 votes

CATEGORY Computer Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "mickey" |
0 votes

Why can't cats use computers?

Because they only want to chase the mouse.

0 votes

CATEGORY Computer Jokes
posted by "KenKai" |
0 votes

Once you start playing with software you quickly become aware that each
software package has a revision code attached to it. It is obvious that
this revision code gives the sequence of changes to the product, but in
reality there's substantially more information available through the rev
code than that. This is a guide for interpreting the meaning of the
revision codes and what they actually signify.

1.0: Also known as "one point uh-oh", or "barely out of beta". We had
to release because the lab guys had reached a point of exhaustion and
the marketing guys were in a cold sweat of terror. We're praying that
you'll find it more functional than, say, a computer virus and that its
operation has some resemblance to that specified in the marketing copy.

1.1: We fixed all the killer bugs...

1.2: Uh, we introduced a few new bugs fixing the killer bugs and so we
had to fix them, too.

2.0: We did the product we really wanted to do to begin with. Mind you,
it's really not what the customer needs yet, but we're working on it.

2.1: Well, not surprisingly, we broke some things in making major
changes so we had to fix them. But we did a really good job of testing
this time, so we don't think we introduced any new bugs while we were
fixing these bugs.

2.2: Uh, sorry, one slipped through. One lousy typo error and you won't
believe how much trouble it caused!

2.3: Some jerk found a deep-seated bug that's been there since 1.0 and
wouldn't stop nagging until we fixed it!!

3.0: Hey, we finally think we've got it right! Most of the customers
are really happy with this.

3.1: Of course, we did break a few little things.

4.0: More features. It's doubled in size now, by the way, and you'll
need to get more memory and a faster processor ...

4.1: Just one or two bugs this time ... Honest!

5.0: We really need to go on to a new product, but we have an installed
base out there to protect. We're cutting the staffing after this.

6.0: We had to fix a few things we broke in 5.0. Not very many, but
it's been so long since we looked at this thing we might as well call it
a major upgrade. Oh, yeah, we added a few flashy cosmetic features so we
could justify the major upgrade number.

6.1: Since I'm leaving the company and I'm the last guy left in the lab
who works on the product, I wanted to make sure that all the changes
I've made are incorporated before I go. I added some cute demos, too,
since I was getting pretty bored back here in my dark little corner (I
kept complaining about the lighting but they wouldn't do anything).
They're talking about obsolescence planning but they'll try to keep
selling it for as long as there's a buck or two to be made. I'm leaving
the bits in as good a shape as I can in case somebody has to tweak them,
but it'll be sheer luck if no one loses them.

0 votes

CATEGORY Computer Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |