marriage jokes
Favorite this joke A little old guy is walking around in a supermarket calling out, "Crisco, Crisssssssco!"
Soon an assistant manager approaches and says, "Sir, the Crisco is in aisle 3."
The old guy replies, "Oh, I'm not looking for the cooking stuff. I'm calling my wife. She's in here somewhere."
The clerk is astonished. "Your wife's name is Crisco?"
The old guy answers, "Oh no, no, no. I only call her that when we're out in public."
"I see," said the clerk. "What do you call her at home?"
"Lard ass."
Lady: My husband keeps talking in his sleep.
Doctor: Just allow him to speak during the day, and he will be alright.
A man and his wife are talking:
Man - "What would happen if I were to win the lottery?"
Woman - "I would take half and leave you in a heartbeat!"
Man - "I won twelve dollars, here's six now get out!"
A 90 year old geezer married a very young filly and was telling his doctor that they were expecting a baby.
"Let me tell you a story," the doctor said. "There was an absent-minded fellow who went hunting one day, but instead of picking up a gun, he picked up an umbrella. Suddenly, while he was out in the woods, a bear charged him. He pointed his umbrella at the bear, shot and killed it on the spot.
"Not possible!" the old geezer exclaimed. "Someone else must have shot that bear."
"Exactly!" the doctor replied.
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