religious jokes

Category: "Religious Jokes"
1 votes

A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.

The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"

My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."

Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"

He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."

1 votes

posted by "Merkv814" |
$25.00 won 11 votes

Little Johnny swallowed a coin and his mother was very much alarmed. She said to her husband, "Quick, quick send for the doctor!"

"No," replied Johnny's father. "Not the doctor, get the minister instead!"

"Oh no," exclaimed the mother. "You think Johnny is going to die?"

Father replied, "Oh, no, but our minister can get money out of anyone!"

11 votes

Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Benjones" |
3 votes

Mabel never went to church. She always promised to go but never did. The pastor was astounded when she suddenly showed up for Sunday service. Thereafter she was there for every Sunday service.

Three months later, after a Sunday service, the pastor asked her, “What happened to you? You always dodged church and now it looks like you can't get enough of it?"

She replied, “It's this new car of mine pastor... they told me the warranty will lapse if I miss even one service!”

3 votes

posted by "Retired Terp" |
$7.00 won 4 votes

Sunday School Teacher: Okay class... who can tell me what are some different names used when talking about God?

Boy: Hallowed!

Sunday School Teacher: Hallowed? How did you get that as an answer?

Boy: It’s in the Lord’s Prayer: Our Father who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name....

4 votes

Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |