Father: You better pass that exam or else forget that I'm your father.
Son: Ok, dad.
Father: How was your exam?
Son: Who are you?
Teacher: Suppose you have $10 and you asked your brother for $5. How much would you have then?
Student: My brother won't give me any money.
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I did not do?"
TEACHER:" Of course not."
PUPIL: "Good, because I haven't done my homework."
Teacher: Why are you late, John?
John: Because of the sign down the road.
Teacher: What does sign have to do with you being late?
John: The sign said 'School Ahead, Go SLOW!'