Best Jokes

I don't take offense. Fence thieves will take a fence, though.

Little Johnny is in art class. The art teacher asks, “What are you drawing?"

Johnny answers, “A cow eating grass,"

"Where's the grass?"

"The cow ate it!"

"Oh... what about the cow?"

"She ran away!"

A tightwad was convinced by a friend to buy a couple of lottery tickets. But after he won the big prize he didn’t seem happy.

“What’s wrong?” the friend asked. “You just became a millionaire!”

“I know,” he groaned, “but I can’t imagine why I bought that second ticket!”

A very exited mother asked her daughter, "Well, what happened when you showed the girls in the office your new engagement ring? Did they all admire it?"

Her daughter replied, "Better than that, four of them recognized it!"