Best Jokes

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A helicopter carrying passengers suddenly loses engine power and the aircraft begins to decent. The pilot safely performs an emergency landing in water, and tells the passengers to remain seated and to keep the doors closed, stating that in emergency situations, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat for 30 minutes, giving rescuers time to get to them. Just then a man gets out if his seat and runs over to open the door. The pilots screams at him, "Didn't you hear what I said, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat as long as the doors remain closed?!".
"Of course I heard you", the man replied, "but it's also designed to fly, and look how good that one worked out!!"

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CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
posted by "Anonymous1005" |
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People say that there is no difference between ‘finished’ and ‘complete’. I say there is...

Marry the right person, and you’re COMPLETE.

Marry the wrong person, and you’re FINISHED.

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CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "candice ramroop" |
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"Yes, Theo, what is it?" asked the teacher.

"I don’t wan to alarm you, Miss Davis, but my dad said if I don't get better grades, someone was going to be in big trouble."

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CATEGORY Teacher Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |
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The poet had been droning on at the party about his various sources of inspiration. “Yes, he told the young girl. “I’m at present collecting some of my better poems to be published posthumously.” “Lovely,” said the girl. “I’ll look forward to it.”

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CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |