Best Jokes

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph.

"Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel "Any cops following us?"

The blonde turned around and had a long look at the road behind them.

"Yeah, looks like it"

Are his flashers on?"

The blonde turned around again......

"Yup.... nope.... yup.... nope.... yup.... nope.... yup....."

Man and wife driving through the countryside come across a herd of goats.

Wife to hubby whilst pointing at the goat's: Your relatives!

Hubby to wife: Yes they are....from my wife's side.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.

He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. “How about some perfume?” he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle.

“That’s a bit much,” said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00. “That’s still quite a bit,” Tim complained.

Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle. “What I mean,” said Tim, “is I’d like to see something really cheap.”

The clerk handed him a mirror.