Best Jokes

My wife and I were happy for 25 years, ..... and then we met.

Police: Where do u live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With Me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbors house.
Police: Where is your neighbors house?
Me: You won't believe me if I tell you.
Police: Tell Me!
Me: Next to my house.

According to Chewbacca The Force Awakens coming soon to a Disney Theme Park near you.

Dad I think the Smiths next door are angry at us.” “Why is that?”
“They’re probably mad because our dog can retrieve the newspaper, and theirs can’t.” “How could you possibly know that? We don’t even subscribe to the paper.” “Yeah, that’s probably got something to do with it, too.”