Best Jokes

Two drunk guys were fighting.

One of them drew a line in the dirt, and said if the other crossed it they would punch them in the face.

That was the punchline.

My face in the mirror isn’t wrinkled or drawn.

My house isn’t dirty. The cobwebs are gone.

My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.

I think I might never put my glasses back on.

Q: Why does Santa Claus like to go down the chimney?

A: Because it soots him!

An inebriated young actor staggered into a large hotel in Hollywood and looked into a large mirror in the lobby.

After a minute or so passed he said, in a loud voice, "Look, they've got a picture of me here, too!"