Whenever I see a woman driving a bus I smile and think about how far we, as a society, have come in equality.
And then I wait for the next bus.
Two drunk guys were fighting.
One of them drew a line in the dirt, and said if the other crossed it they would punch them in the face.
That was the punchline.
My face in the mirror isn’t wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn’t dirty. The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.
I think I might never put my glasses back on.
Q: Why does Santa Claus like to go down the chimney?
A: Because it soots him!