Latest Jokes

Rebecca said to her husband, “Do you know the neighbor’s daughter scored a 99 on her math exam?”

Her husband Tom, sipping his tea, remarked, “Really? What happened to the remaining 1 point?”

Rebecca replied sarcastically, “Your son scored it.”

Tom: "If your girlfriend and your best friend were drowning, who would you save?"

Hardy: "I don't know, that's a tough one."

Tom: "Why is that?"

Hardy: "Well, what were they doing together in the first place?"

Ms. Higgins asked the class, “If you were to choose between fortune & prosperity at one end, and cleverness & intellect on the other, what would be your choice?”

John raised his hand and answered, “I would opt for fortune & prosperity.”

Mrs. Higgins said, “If I were you, I would choose cleverness and intellect.”

John was quick to answer, “Maybe you are right, one chooses what one is deficient in.”

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company over 30 years, he retired. Several years later the company contacted him with a problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines.

They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine fixed, but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is."

The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges.

The engineer responded with the following account:
Chalk: $1.00
Knowing where to put the 'X': $49,999.00