Latest Jokes

A police officer found a lost toddler hysterically calling her mother. The police tried to talk and console the toddler.

Police: "Don't worry child, I will help you go home. Where do you live?"
Toddler: "With my parents."

Police: "Where do your parents live?"
Toddler: "With me."

Police: "Where do you all live?"
Toddler: "In our house."

Police: "Where is your house?"
Toddler: "Next to our neighbor's house."

Police: "Where is your neighbor's house?"
Toddler: "Will you get me home if I tell you?"

Police: "Tell me."
Toddler: "Next to our house."

Why do trees have trunks?

So they'll always be ready to leave!

A heavy snowstorm closed the schools in one town.

When the children returned to school a few days later, one grade school teacher asked her students whether they had used the time away from school constructively.

"I sure did, teacher," one little girl replied. "I just prayed for more snow."

Used to being the center of attention, Robbie was a little more than jealous of his new baby sister.

The parents sat him down and said that now that she was getting older, the house was too small and they'd have to move.

"It's no use," Robbie said. "She's crawling good now and she'd probably just follow us."