I was getting ready for a doctor's appointment and remembered how my mother once told me, "An apple a day, keeps the doctor away."
Taking her words to heart I decided to bring an apple. Needless to say, it was shot day, I didn't like needles and was thinking, "There must be some way out of this?"
So without thinking, I threw my apple at the doctor. He hasn't spoken to me since.
Why did the teddy bear skip lunch?
Because he was stuffed!!
Why did the elevator go to the doctor?
Because it was coming down with something.
How did the octopus defeat the shark?
He was well armed!