Latest Jokes

I used to work in an art supply store. We sold artists' canvas by the yard, and you could get it in either of two widths: 36 inches or 48 inches.

Customer: "Can you please cut some canvas for me?"

Me: "Certainly, what width?"

Customer (confused and slightly annoyed): "Scissors?"

A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly ...

... and as you can see, they were Wright.

Sue: My uncle is an umpire in a restaurant.

Lou: In a restaurant?

Sue: Yes. When someone orders pancakes, he yells, “Batter up!”