Classmates at college were lamenting the cost of long distance phone service and debating the relative advantages of AT&T, MCI, and Sprint.
"I've found CTC to be the cheapest plan around," offered one.
"CTC? Who are they?"
"You know," he responded. "Call Them Collect."
Friend: "What are you going to give your mother-in-law for Christmas?"
Me: "Her son back!"
A customer at a restaurant summoned the waiter and said angrily, “Look at the size of this piece of beef. Last evening, I received a piece more than twice its size!”
“Where did you sit?” asked the waiter.
“By the window. Why does that matter?”
“Well, that explains it. We always serve larger portions to customers sitting by the window. It’s good advertising.”