Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke As we were putting out cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve, I accidentally dropped one. "No problem," I said, picking it up and dusting it off before placing it back on the plate.
"You can't do that," argued my four-year-old.
"Don't worry. Santa will never know."
He shot me a look. "So he knows if I've been bad or good, but he doesn't know if you dropped a cookie on the floor?"
Doctor: What happens when you have a bladder infection?
Patient: I don't know.
Doctor: Urine trouble.
A New York importer consulted the wine list at an in in the Chateau district of France. She was surprised to note that the wines of poor years were priced very much higher than those of good years.
"It is for your compatriots, who usually know nothing about wines," the proprietor explained. "They always order the most expensive. Thus we sell them our poor wines and save the best for our regular clients.
You miss 100% of the shots you DON'T take...
You also miss 95% of the shots you DO take...
You stink and you're off the team is basically what I'm trying to say.
Free Daily Joke