animal jokes

One day a man is walking down the street when he sees an old man with a nice looking dog. He goes over to the man and asks, "Does your dog bite?" the old man replies "No never". When the man bends down to stroke the dog, it immediately takes a snap at his hand. The man says, "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!", "I did" replies the old man, "But this isn't my dog!'.

Dolphins are so intelligent that within a few weeks of captivity they can train a man to stand on the edge of their pool and throw to them fish three times a day.

Two campers where hiking in the forest when all of a sudden a bear jumps out of a bush and starts chasing them.

Both campers start running for their lives when one of them stops and starts to put on his running shoes.

His partner says, "What are you doing? You can't outrun a bear!"

His friend replies, "I don't have to outrun the bear, I only have to outrun you!"

Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said, "Look at that dog with one eye!"

The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, "Where?"