Dear Santa,
For this year I'm requesting a BIG bank account and a SMALL body.
P.S. Please don't mix them up like you did last year.
This Christmas, I told my girlfriend that all I wanted was an Xbox, nothing more. That’s it. Beginning and end of list, one Xbox.
You know what she got me? A homemade frame with a picture of us from our first date together.
Which was fine... because I bought her an Xbox.
Why are Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen always wet?
Because they are rain deer.
A church was preparing for Christmas services. The pastor decided he wanted a banner made for the entryway and had a parishioner call the sign company.
The parishioner told the man on the phone the message he wanted and the dimensions needed for the entryway.
The sign came back a few days later... "Unto Mary Jesus was born, six feet long and two feet wide."