marriage jokes

A guy goes to the post office to report that his wife is lost. The Postmaster advises him to report it the police.

The man says," Last time she was lost I reported it to the Police and they brought her back promptly. I'm not taking any chances this time!"

Husband: Every time I yell and get angry at you, you never fight back. How do you manage your anger?

Wife: I clean the toilet seat.

Husband: How does that help?

Wife: I use your toothbrush.

My wife keeps reminding me about some things that need repair around the house. One would think that after six months she’d know I have the list memorized.