marriage jokes

Last night, my wife and I watched two movies back to back.

Fortunately for me, I was the one who was facing the television.

He didn't like the casserole, and he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard,
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't make the coffee right,
He didn't like my stew,
I didn't fold his pants,
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer, I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked him,
Just like his mother used to do.

When my teenage son worked part time in a hardware store, a man came in to buy hooks for hanging plants. But there were only two hooks left in the gold color that he needed.

My son, trying to be helpful, suggested, "Could you maybe use the silver or the white instead? "

The customer scrutinized him and said, "You're not married, are you?"