marriage jokes
Favorite this joke My wife just called me pretentious.
I was so surprised my monocle fell out.
My husband's expanding waistline was a sore subject, but I could no longer ignore it, especially since he's still young and handsome.
"Honey," I said, using a seductive voice, "If you lose 20 pounds, I promise to dance for you."
Using his sarcastic voice, he shot back, "Lose ten pounds and I'll watch."
A recent survey done by marriage experts shows that the most common form of marriage proposal these days consists of the words: "You're what?!?"
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"
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