religious jokes

Category: "Religious Jokes"
$25.00 won 4 votes

Doug went to the eye doctor for an examination because he was having trouble reading the newspaper. "Now that you're over 40," the doctor told him, "you've developed a condition called 'presbyopia,' in which the lens of your eye can no longer focus as well as it used to."

Seeing his worried look, the doctor tried to be upbeat. "Congratulations!" he said. "You're now officially a presbyope!"

Doug leaned over and asked seriously, "If that means I'm no longer a Roman Catholic, do I still have to go to Confession?"

4 votes

posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
2 votes

A policeman is praying at a church when a priest comes to him.

Priest: “Tell me son, who killed Abel?’

Policeman: “I'm sorry Father, but you'll have to ask the detective in charge of this Abel's murder case.”

2 votes

posted by "Psalmlocoh" |
$8.00 won 2 votes

A pastor assured his congregation he was their servant and that they should feel free to call him anytime they had a problem.

That night the pastor's phone rang at 3 a.m. On the other end was a dear elderly lady who said, "Pastor, I can't sleep."

"I'm so sorry to hear that," he comforted her. "But what can I do about it?" the pastor asked.

She sweetly replied, "Preach to me a while, pastor."

2 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |
$25.00 won 1 votes

It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.

One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"

The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my Mom says it's a pain in the ass to iron."

1 votes

posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |