word play jokes

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend...

Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

I was visiting a monastery recently and I saw a sign that read, "In case of fire, break vow of silence."

Way down upon the Mississippi, two tugboat captains, who had been friends for years, would always cry, "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed each other.

A new crewman asked his boat's mate, "What do they do that for?"

The mate looked surprised and replied, "You mean that you've never heard of... an aye for an aye and a toot for a toot?"

Sign at the towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg, we just want tows!"