I told my friend that my wife and I had a huge argument and she left for the Caribbean.
"Jamaica?" he asked.
"No," I replied, "she went of her own accord."
I won $3 million on the Lottery this weekend. I decided to donate a quarter of it to Charity.
Now I have $2,999,999.75!
While taking the garbage out the other day, I lifted up a pretty heavy bag of trash and threw my back out.
I had to drive all the way to the dump to retrieve it.
What do you call a Broadway production performed on a huge scrabble board?
A play on words!