Best Jokes
Favorite this joke Murphy and his wife went for a stroll in the park. They sit down on a bench to rest for awhile. Soon they overhear voices coming from a secluded spot nearby.
Suddenly, Mrs. Murphy realizes that a young man is about to propose. Not wanting to be eavesdropping during such an intimate moment, she gently nudges her husband and whispers, "Whistle, to let that young couple know that someone can hear them."
To which Murphy replies, "Whistle? Why should I whistle? Nobody whistled to warn me?"
Did you hear about the new surgery kit that lets the patients sew up his own incisions?
It's called Suture Yourself.
A husband got his mother-in-law a cemetery plot for Christmas. It came with a coffin, tomb stone, the works.
Next Christmas comes by and the husband gets her nothing. The mother-in-law asks, "Why didn't you get me a gift?"
The husband says, "You haven't used the one I got you last year."
The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.
After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude . . .?"
After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone."
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