During history class the teacher was discussing George Washington.
"George Washington, not only did he chopped down his cherry tree," the teacher explained, "but he also admitted to doing it. Does anyone know why his father did not punish him? "
After a few minutes of silence Little Johnny answered, "Maybe because George still had the ax in his hand?"
What’s the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?
A golfer goes whack and then "Darn!" while a skydiver goes “Darn!” and then whack.
Why couldn’t the astronaut book a room on the moon?
It was full.
A school girl was required to write an essay of two hundred and fifty words about an automobile. She submitted the following:
"My uncle bought an automobile. He was riding in the country when it busted going up a hill. I guess this is about fifty words. The other two hundred are what my uncle said when he was walking back to town, but they are not for publication."