What do you call a number that can't keep still?
A roamin' numeral.
Lady at shoe store: "Pardon me, but do you have any loafers?'
Store clerk: "Yes we do."
Lady: "Well, send one of them here to help me carry these boxes."
He didn't like the casserole, and he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard,
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't make the coffee right,
He didn't like my stew,
I didn't fold his pants,
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer, I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked him,
Just like his mother used to do.
What's the most regrettable means of communication?
Remorse code.