Best Jokes

Lawyer: “Now, would you please tell the Jury the truth. Why did you shoot your husband with a bow and arrow?”

Defendant: “I didn't want to wake up the children.”

If I had a dollar for every time someone tells me to grow up...

I could build the coolest tree house ever!

At the doctor's waiting room a man was sitting opposite a mother and her little daughter.

He asks the little girl, "Hi there, and how old are you?"

The little girl showed him 4 fingers to indicate she is 4 years old.

The man says, "That is nice, but can't you talk?"

The little girl replies, "Yes I can, but can't you count?"

I applied for a job as a weatherman, but my knowledge of meteorology was a little cloudy.