Best Jokes

A woman was taking care of a neighbor's little girl one morning. She arrived in time for breakfast and sat down at the table. "Mommy always makes me hot muffins for breakfast," the girl said.

Eager to please, the woman went into the kitchen and prepared a tine of hot, fresh muffins.

"No thank you," the girl said when they were brought to her.

The surprised woman replied, "I thought you said your mother always has muffins for breakfast?"

"She does, but I don't eat them."

Sally told her boyfriend that she wanted to walk down the aisle...

So he agreed, and took her grocery shopping.

A woman was taking her time browsing through everything at a friend's yard sale. "My husband is going to be very angry I stopped at a yard sale," she said.

"I'm sure he'll understand when you tell him about all the bargains you found," her friend replied.

"Normally, yes," she said. "But he just broke his leg, and he's waiting for me to take him to the hospital to have it set."

Q: What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?

A: One says "See you later" and the other says "In a while".