Best Jokes

1 votes

My new AARP membership arrived in today’s mail as a scratch & sniff card.

I scratch my head over saving a buck on a hotel room and sniff back the tears of joining the blue-haired 4:45 dinner special.

1 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Wano U" |
1 votes

My 12 year old son tried coffee for the first time today.

"It tastes like dirt!" he said.

I told him it was just ground this morning.

1 votes

posted by "nerdasaurus" |
$8.00 won 1 votes

Rich old man had three younger friends that he wanted to do something nice for. He summoned them to his mansion. He told them he wanted to do something nice for each of them and was gonna give each one million dollars.

There was one stipulation, upon his death he wanted to be buried with that million from each of them. They all agreed. Several years later, the old man died. Fast forward to the grave site, the three men are there all by themselves.

1st man says to the 2nd man: “You know, I’m gonna miss our friend. But I have to admit it was tough to put all that money in the coffin.”

2nd man acknowledges and says, “Yeah, I know what you mean.“

The first two men look across the grave and say to the 3rd man, “You don’t look so sad. Did you put your million in the coffin too?”

3rd man says: “Oh yes, I did, and I’m gonna miss him too. But I don’t think he is gonna cash that check wherever he's going!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Money Jokes
posted by "Jim Arnoux" |
1 votes

Last year for Christmas I got a humidifier and a dehumidifier...

I thought I would put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

1 votes

posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |