Best Jokes

Some deer were talking with each other in the woods.

"There goes Barney the buck, out on his sales route."

"They say he's their top selling salesdeer, selling cosmetics to the ladies."

"I wonder what makes him so successful?"

"It's simple. He goes doe to doe!"

Kanye West recently gave his wife, Kim Kardashian, a massive second diamond engagement ring.

Kim said, “Wow, thank you so much.”

While every married guy in America said, “Yeah, thanks A LOT Kanye!”

A boy with a pea shooter, ran out of ammunition, and discovering a box of laxative pills, tried one in his blow gun. To his great joy, it fit.

There was a boarding house near by, and every Wednesday noon a big pan of custard was placed upon the window sill to cool. From his vantage point in the window of another house, the boy shot all the pills into the custard.

The boy soon found out that he was an expert marksman and the custom of custard on Wednesday quickly passed into history at the boarding house.

A couple took a puddle-jumping flight with 4 stops on the way to Dallas. At the first stop, a little white truck drove up to the plane's wing.

Wife: "What's that truck doing?"

Husband: "We're taking on more fuel."

The refueling process was repeated at the next two stops as well. At the last stop before Dallas:

Husband: "Ya know, in spite of all these delays, we're making pretty good time."

Wife (pointing out the window): "Maybe -- but that little white truck is keeping up with us!"