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A not so bright young lady in the pet shop ask about buying a gold fish.
The salesperson ask if she needed an aquarium.
Her reply was, "I don't care what sign it is."
While attending a marriage seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."
He addressed the men, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"
Tom, smiling but looking a little nervous, leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's self-rising flour, right?"
Why did the banana go to the Doctor?
Because he wasn't peeling well.
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