Best Jokes

I was on my way out of the house to meet with a cantankerous client, and I was dreading it. The look on my face must have given me away because my four-year-old daughter asked what was wrong.

"I’m going to meet a woman who always yells at Daddy," I told her.

"Oh," she said. "Say hi to Mommy for me."

I found a method that I can drop an egg from 6 feet and have it not break...

Drop it from 7 feet! (It won't break those first 6 feet!)

A man and his wife are talking:

Man - "What would happen if I were to win the lottery?"

Woman - "I would take half and leave you in a heartbeat!"

Man - "I won twelve dollars, here's six now get out!"

I am finally financially set for life...

As long as I "go" next Tuesday.