Best Jokes

$5.00 won 3 votes

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places.

He told me to quit going to those places.

3 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "merk" |
3 votes

Mama Skunk had two children named In and Out.

The two were always on the go, but rarely in one place at the same time. Whenever In was in, Out was out. Whenever In was out, Out was in.

One day at dinner time, Out was home, but In was no where to be seen. Mama Skunk sent Out out to bring In in for dinner. Out quickly returned with In and Mama was amazed.

"However did you find In so quickly in all the vast forest?" asked Mama.

"Easy," said Out. "Instinct!"

3 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

As we were putting out cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve, I accidentally dropped one. "No problem," I said, picking it up and dusting it off before placing it back on the plate.

"You can't do that," argued my four-year-old.

"Don't worry. Santa will never know."

He shot me a look. "So he knows if I've been bad or good, but he doesn't know if you dropped a cookie on the floor?"

3 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

A senior citizen in Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana.”

When asked why, he replied, "I'd rather be in Louisiana 'cause everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the world."

3 votes

posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |