Best Jokes

3 votes

Yesterday, I ate a clock.

It was very time consuming.

Especially when I went back for seconds.

3 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

There's quite an art to falling apart as the years go by,
And life doesn't begin at 40. That's a big fat lie.
My hair's getting thinner, my body is not;
The few teeth I have are beginning to rot.

I smell of Vick's-Vapo-Rub, not Chanel # 5;
My new pacemaker's all that keeps me alive.
When asked of my past, every detail I'll know,
But what was I doing 10 minutes ago?

Well, you get the idea, what more can I say?
I'm off to read the obituary like I do every day;
If my names not there, I'll once again start -
Perfecting the art of falling apart.

3 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "merk" |
$8.00 won 3 votes

I’m working on a new typeface to be used for church bulletins...

I call it 'Baptismal Font.'

3 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |
3 votes

I have a phobia of German sausages...

Yes, I fear the wurst!

3 votes

CATEGORY Puns
posted by "wadejagz" |